If NPCs were honest …

Ah, NPCs. Love ’em, hate ’em … they do a lot of weird stuff. In this blog post, I’m going to be sharing what I think NPCs would say if they were completely transparent and honest (for once).

  • “I know I just met you a few minutes ago and have no reason to trust you, but I’m about to send you on a very important mission that could change everything if you fail.”
  • “I stand on the sidewalk right next to where the extremely dangerous enemies are because well … I don’t know. What I do know is I’m going to send you to fight them off for me.”
  • “Yes, I do find it odd how it took you about a month to finish this one task, but I’m not one to pry and ask questions. I’ll just act like you were quick about it so we can move forward.”
  • “I know absolutely¬†nothing about your fighting capabilities, but I’m about to send you into a potentially dangerous situation anyway.”
  • “Funny, another wizard/pirate just said the same EXACT thing earlier today. Weird. Anyway …”
  • “I don’t really know what this ‘XP’ stuff is, but I’m supposed to give it to you every once in awhile. Hope you find it useful I guess?”
  • “Of course I have no problem giving away my hard earned gold and sometimes rare items to a complete stranger in exchange for help with something that I probably could’ve done myself.”
  • “It’s kinda rude when people come up to me and walk away as soon as I start talking. I could be saying something really valuable you know.”
  • “Sometimes I feel like I’m living ‘Groundhog Day.’ Trapped in an endless cycle. That’s ridiculous though, right?”
  • “Really? Can you wait? Can’t you see I’m already talking with someone? I can only say my required spiel so fast.”
  • “I’m only 25% sure you’ll return alive.”
  • “Since this is a side quest, I know there’s a good chance I’ll never see you again.”
  • “My village’s problems are nothing compared to the other things currently on your plate, but I need you to solve them before I can offer you any help.”
  • “That abandoned warehouse probably isn’t abandoned.”

What are some things you think NPCs would say if they were honest? Share your thoughts in the comments!

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